The priestly consecration

Friends, for a while now we have been busy looking at philosophy, morality and whatever else yours truly finds interesting. Today we will look at the good book from where we stopped. When we were last here, we looked at the priestly portion in offerings and why I really wanted to be a priest in my next life.

The lord commands Moses to consecrate Aaron and his sons, Aaron who you remember was the chief architect of the golden calf and also the chief executioner when Moses returned from wherever he had disappeared to, to the priestly family. This part of the book is really boring, and I don’t want to be accused of cherry picking so here is the story.

 ⁸ He then placed the breastpiece on him, and in the breastpiece he put the Urim and the Thummim. ⁹ He also placed the turban on his head, and on the turban, at its front, he placed the golden plate, the holy crown, just as the Lord had commanded Moses.

Seriously, Moses couldn’t you just tell god this business of turbans and breastpieces is for soldiers and has nothing to do with preaching.

¹⁰ Moses then took the anointing oil and anointed the tabernacle and all that was in it, and consecrated them. ¹¹ He sprinkled some of it on the altar seven times and anointed the altar and all its utensils, and the basin and its stand, to consecrate them.

You see god needs cleans utensils for BBQ or why else would they consecrate bowls?

¹⁴ Then he brought the bull of the sin offering, and Aaron and his sons laid their hands on the head of the bull of the sin offering.

I wouldn’t want to be a bull 🙂 what with being offered as sin offering.

¹⁶ He also took all the fat that was on the entrails and the lobe of the liver, and the two kidneys and their fat; and Moses offered it up in smoke on the altar. ¹⁷ But the bull and its hide and its flesh and its refuse he burned in the fire outside the camp, just as the Lord had commanded Moses.

I would not be found within a mile radius of where this burning is taking place.

¹⁸ Then he presented the ram of the burnt offering, and Aaron and his sons laid their hands on the head of the ram. ¹⁹ Moses slaughtered it and sprinkled the blood around on the altar. ²⁰ When he had cut the ram into its pieces, Moses offered up the head and the pieces and the suet in smoke.²¹ After he had washed the entrails and the legs with water, Moses offered up the whole ram in smoke on the altar. It was a burnt offering for a soothing aroma; it was an offering by fire to the Lord, just as the Lord had commanded Moses.

You remember god likes sweet aromas and lots of blood? Is this the reason why he created sheep and bulls to be slaughtered? This is quite wasteful if you ask me.

²² Then he presented the second ram, the ram of ordination, and Aaron and his sons laid their hands on the head of the ram. ²³ Moses slaughtered it and took some of its blood and put it on the lobe of Aaron’s right ear, and on the thumb of his right hand and on the big toe of his right foot.

God has a sense of humour 🙂  Enough said!

²⁴ He also had Aaron’s sons come near; and Moses put some of the blood on the lobe of their right ear, and on the thumb of their right hand and on the big toe of their right foot. Moses then sprinkled the rest of the blood around on the altar. ²⁵ He took the fat, and the fat tail, and all the fat that was on the entrails, and the lobe of the liver and the two kidneys and their fat and the right thigh.

I wouldn’t wait for any of this. I know why I couldn’t make a priest.

²⁶ From the basket of unleavened bread that was before the Lord, he took one unleavened cake and one cake of bread mixed with oil and one wafer, and placed them on the portions of fat and on the right thigh.²⁷ He then put all these on the hands of Aaron and on the hands of his sons and presented them as a wave offering before the Lord.

I didn’t realise god likes waves as well. I will start asking my friends if they still offer wave offerings. I would need to see one being offered.

³⁰ So Moses took some of the anointing oil and some of the blood which was on the altar and sprinkled it on Aaron, on his garments, on his sons, and on the garments of his sons with him; and he consecrated Aaron, his garments, and his sons, and the garments of his sons with him.

What is the point in having clean clothes if someone is going to sprinkle blood on them. Please someone clear the road, I need to run before someone messes my clothes. I have a date and no time or change of clothes.

³¹ Then Moses said to Aaron and to his sons, “Boil the flesh at the doorway of the tent of meeting, and eat it there together with the bread which is in the basket of the ordination offering, just as I commanded, saying, ‘Aaron and his sons shall eat it.’

I knew this part was coming. They always must eat, what would be the point in being a priest if you don’t eat the choicest meat. Show me a poor priest and I will show you a fool.

³² The remainder of the flesh and of the bread you shall burn in the fire. ³³ You shall not go outside the doorway of the tent of meeting for seven days, until the day that the period of your ordination is fulfilled; for he will ordain you through seven days.

They had to finish the food before they left the tent or else someone may just have ideas 🙂

³⁴ The Lord has commanded to do as has been done this day, to make atonement on your behalf. ³⁵ At the doorway of the tent of meeting, moreover, you shall remain day and night for seven days and keep the charge of the Lord, so that you will not die, for so I have been commanded.”³⁶ Thus Aaron and his sons did all the things which the Lord had commanded through Moses.

This is the first time since we started reading that we have a verse written in the first person narrative!