Random rants

A few days ago I was flagged down by traffic cop on one of the new roads recently made in China by the Chinese in the pretext that I was over-speeding. If these random stops were to ensure safety on the roads, yours truly would have no trouble supporting the efforts of the police. Unfortunately, these are opportunities for the traffic cops to extort law-abiding citizens of their hard-earned money while un-roadworthy vehicles ferry passengers. These are most times overloaded and are driven by men who do not remember when they were last sober! Next time a cop flags me down and claims I was driving beyond the speed limit, the discussion will be different from the one we had recently!

Recently the senate debated and passed a bill that allows anyone above thirty to own a gun. My first reaction when I had this was, what the fuck! are these numbskulls serious? The reason we pay tax to the government is not so that they can create stupid commissions and tribunals to investigate sometimes very mundane things like soldiers who were seen on camera stealing during the botched Westgate siege. If, as is clear, the government has failed in its duty to provide the citizens with security, it is only right we stop paying tax and find ways of getting the other services we pay the government to offer. Should this bill come into law, I promise, I am going to find as many ways to not pay tax as I can get.

Our MPigs, recently voted to pass a bill that would in the long run make it impossible to be critical of the government or the clowns running it. This bill is with the current clown in the office of the president. I hope he returns it to those retards in parliament to remove the offending clauses. I don’t like our journalists much, and with good reason, but I will defend their right and mine to spew all the nonsense they broadcast on TV, radio and print media without fear of arrest or intimidation.

There is a con man in the loose on the streets of Nairobi going by the name Elphas and phone number 0715547822 pretending he has several millions of dollars to invest but keeps asking for money. Should you be his unlucky victim, yours truly has granted you permission to stone him.

And lastly, to the ladies and gentlemen working at Airtel Kenya who happen to be my network providers you really should style up. I don’t understand why applying for a postpaid account is such a hassle! It’s harder than opening a bank account in some instance and all you want is my money. Style up, shape up or you will lose business to your competition!