Chronicles of YHWH 4: Proving YHWH’s Existence

At one time, after listening to various freethinkers on earth, YHWH became worried. His very existence was being questioned. So he consulted his chief strategist, Angel Gabriel:

YHWH: “Gabriel, after listening to those atheists down there, I’m beginning to doubt my own existence. It’s weird. Something must be done.”

 Gabriel: “Well, you can manifest your powers on earth in such a way that no one will doubt your existence anymore.”

 YHWH: “Ah – excellent suggestion. I’ll go down there and beat their strongest warrior into a pulp. That will show them.”

 Gabriel: “I wouldn’t do that. Last time you tried that with Jacob, he beat you up for an entire night, even after you magically broke his hip. You ended up surrendering.”

 YHWH (Fuming): “Remind me of that night again, and I’ll turn you into a pillar of salt, Gabriel.”

 Gabriel: “Sorry. Say, what if you went down there, and blew everyone’s mind with your magic tricks?”

 YWHW: “Hey, I can do that! Tell you what, I’ll transform myself into a fertilized egg, enter the womb of a virgin, and get born in a cattle boma. Then, when I reach 33 years, I’ll let the people beat me up and kill me, and… wait for it… RESURRECT after three days! Ha ha! That will show them.”

Gabriel: “Uh… okay. You know best, Lord.”

 

N/B: For access to all anecdotes in this series, check out List of all “Chronicles of YHWH” notes.