It’s that time of the year


When most people travel or buy gifts to share with relatives and friends, some of whom they don’t like the rest of the year and would rather not meet them, but they are honouring family traditions.

For the young women and men, especially in my village, there is always an auntie asking when you will introduce a significant other and shortly they will be asking about grandchildren.

And finally, there are the atheists, agnostics and many others in between who over the years have come to detest Christmas with all the lights and the ads, especially the ads. I am here to rescue all of you. You see, we have evidence I was born on 25th of Dec. We have no evidence for Jesus or was he Emmanuel. What this means therefore, is, you can, instead of buying gifts for that aunt you don’t like, you can buy me. You can also toast a bottle to my long days or something. Or you can as well call me.

And this, my dear friends, is how you must celebrate my birthday. I have the birth certificate to prove it, just in case one has any doubts. Any Christian who has doubts will have to come with Jesus’ birth certificate before they can see mine.

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About makagutu

As Onyango Makagutu I am Kenyan, as far as I am a man, I am a citizen of the world

37 thoughts on “It’s that time of the year

  1. Antre says:

    Birth certificate or nothing hahaaaa

    Liked by 1 person

  2. john zande says:

    You’re a much better Jesus

    Liked by 3 people

  3. more than happy to drink wine in honor of you. And you bring up a good point, who is this Emmanuel guy?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Swarn Gill says:

    You’re assuming we all like you. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Tish Farrell says:

    You have no idea what a gift you just gave me, Mak. I’m struggling with gift giving to someone I’m very cross with. So it’s a matter of a) – grit the teeth as a matter of family or in this case, friendship’s honour. Or b) give you the present. of course I choose you. But you will have to imagine the big hug I’m sending you. Were you really born on Christmas Day? How very wonderful of you.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Ron says:

    I’ve heard rumors your real place of birth was Hawaii.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. ….And you don’t claim any miracles….but we northern Canadians can walk on water……in January.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Always knew you were a god! Happy fucking birthday, bro!

    Like

  9. judyt54 says:

    And how lovely that someone invented a hoiiday on exactly the same day you were born. Coincidence? I think not…

    Happy Birthday, Happy Solstice, Happy Christmas. (pick any one or all three)

    Like

  10. Nan says:

    I hope you have realized by now how “blessed” you are to have been born on the “most special day of the year.”

    Happy Day! Celebrate and be naughty!

    Like

  11. Carmen says:

    Happy birthday and Merry Christmas, Mak!! Hope all’s well with you and yours!

    Like

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