Who ends up in Hell?
Many fundamentalist ‘Christians’ maintain that Hell is reserved for people who are immoral. Helpfully, they are able to narrow this down into a few specific types of people:
- People who voted for Clinton, Obama, Biden, or any democratic president in history
- Liberals
- Communists
- Liars (unless they are also elected Republicans)
- Thieves
- Murderers
- People who are violent
- People who question my constitutional right to bear arms under the second amendment
- People who question my right to invade other countries so that we can find and remove their weapons from them
- People who don’t live in the United States of America
- Atheists
- Agnostics
- Catholics (according to protestants)
- Protestants (according to Catholics)
- Hypocrites
- Pagans
- Muslims
- Critics of Israel
- Jews
- Hitler
- People who believe that a vaccine is more effective than prayer
- People who believe in evolution
- People who believe the earth is more than six thousand years old
- Christians who don’t take the Bible literally
- People who disagree with my interpretation of an ancient Jewish manuscript written in a completely different time, culture, and context to my own
- Christians who don’t own and read the King James Version of the Bible
- Christians who go to a different church than me
- Christians who believe in free will
- People who have not asked Jesus into their heart of their own free will
- People who have never heard about Jesus
- People who believe that people who have never heard about Jesus will end up in heaven
- People who don’t believe in Hell
- Fornicators
- Masturbators
- Goats
- Gymnasts
- People who dance
- People who engage in pre-marital hand-holding
- Women who speak in church
- Women who wear pants
- Women who cause men to sin by wearing dresses that are too short
- Men who wear dresses
- Women who think they are men
- Men who think they are women
- Women who support men who think they are women
- Men who support women who think are men
- Men who like men
- Women who like women
- Men and women who affirm and support men who like men and women who like women
- Adulterers (unless they are men)
- Rapists (unless the rapist and their victim are married)
- Drunkards
- People who like rock music
- People with tattoos
- People who have read any of the Harry Potter books
- People who watch horror movies
- People who enjoy life
- Witches
- Fortune tellers (unless you call it a prophetic word from the Lord)]
- People who gossip (unless it’s to collect prayer requests)
- People who are greedy
- People who are absurdly rich (unless they are a televangelist)
- People who walk away from the evangelical church after three and a half decades
- Dead people
- People who see dead people
- Cats
- You
Hey, it’s because I love you that I am warning you that you’re going to end up in Hell if you don’t repent and start believing exactly the same things I do. In fact, you’re pretty darn lucky that I am so enlightened and can show you the error of your ways.
Don’t you feel better now that you’ve heard the ‘Good News’ of the Gospel?
I sure do!
In fact, I’m sure glad that I have faithfully administered my Christian duty by warning you about Hell.
Hallelujah
We’re already in hell….the Pacific side of N. America.
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I can imagine.
Are the fires slowing down.
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Not yet, & wind is a huge culprit.
I posted pics on A/U of the one near our daughter’s place when they had to run.
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I will check those out
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In the coffee break group.
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hell will be very crowded, this list includes pretty much 95% of the world population
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The list has everyone. They should be buying more land
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Well it appears there’s at least 18 reasons listed above as to why I’m going to a place I don’t believe exists, but I guess the the most significant reason is the one you highlighted. I was expecting the number to be higher, but then I’m not eligible to be tested against conditions that apply only to Christians, women and assorted animals.
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You and I fall in so many categories, I even stopped reading.
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This is why I’m glad I’m a devout Muslim. EVERYONE else who isn’t will burn in hell for being an infidel!!! 🙂
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Haha.
That list must include category called Islam
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One thing you have never made clear, though: Are you a Shia Muslim or a Sunni Muslim? Because the Shia think the Sunni are going to hell and the Sunni think the Shia are damned. Let alone all the minor sects that the vast majority of Muslims think are damned!
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Many are called but few are chosen…
Your post here is one of the reasons sinners like being Christian. Self deprecation and confessing they are wrong is the only time they feel 100% right. It Cecile’s a competition to see who can loathe the most properly
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It is for comments like this that will take you to hell
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I sure you have nothing to worry about. With Kenya so thick in Jesus you’ll be sucked up in the rapture just with your drafting skills…
✍️ 🚲
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I have been waiting patiently for this rapture to happen but nothing
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Yes, but even if you’re one of the chosen you’d better be dressed for the occasion or JC will send you to hell, as well. (See Matty 22:11-13).
And according to Paul, the “chosen” were selected prior to the foundation of the world (Ephesians 1:4).
So the proper expression should probably be “There but for the grace of God, go I”.
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He gave you ample warning to dress for the occasion. But by the grace of god you also go to hell
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Grace indeed!! Wouldn’t want to spend five seconds in the presence with such a monstrous entity — let alone an eternity.
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He’s already with you Ron. Nothing would change
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Only if you live in the theist’s matrix.
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Would that be the theatrix? Somehow that word fits
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Bravo! Perfect portmanteau.
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ne·ol·o·gism
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That too.
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Five seconds is four seconds too long
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I’d go further and propose that it’s five seconds too long.
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I agree
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If you wear mixed garment, you are hell bound. If you ate shellfish, hell it is.
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Is anyone going to the other place, really?
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Norman Greenbaum
. . . and William Shatner
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Jesus didn’t speak of hell much, but when he did he was talking to the evil people he was speaking to.
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Glad to know I’m guaranteed a place there …. in several categories.
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We will meet under one category or other
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At least I’ll have the good company of the goats! Better them than all the hypocrites that surround me now! Good listing, my Kenyan brother! 😉 Naked hugs!
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Hahaha.
These might be talking goats
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LOL! 😉
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That’s a VERY thorough list! Good job! Now we can feel confident that all our friends will be there to keep us company. 😈
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It’s good consolation, I think
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Goats.
Good, they deserve it.
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What have goats done to deserve such happiness
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Exactly! 😉
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Hitler? It must be because of this:
amirite?
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AAARRRGGHHH!!!!! I REALLY needed to see his legs!!!!! YIKES!!!!
Hahahahaha……
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Oh, come on! Admit it. Der Führer is really rockin’ those knee highs and lederhosen. And that “if these private pictures ever get released on social media, it’s Treblinka for you, Eva” grimace just radiate an aura of tyrannical confidence.
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Hahahahaha….sure………..
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There is a reason the msm is not showing you these pictures.
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Yes. I believe it’s because a top-secret CIA experiment (Project MK-Ultra) determined that seeing these photos led to an uncontrollable urge to yodel in public.
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And because Hitler will be angry
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Haha, yes. That mustache
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https://www.salon.com/2021/08/21/staunch-atheists-show-higher-morals-than-the-proudly-pious-from-the-pandemic-to-climate-change/
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Oh and this list is priceless!
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It covers many bases. It is hard to escape hell
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Yeah, the good news my ass. They tell kids stealing a cookie from the cookie jar sends them to hell.
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Ann, you are going to hell 🙂
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The hell fire brimstone preacher’s are going to hell😁
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I would not like to make their acquaintance in hell.
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I don’t want to meet people like Hitler either.
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What to do?
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My point is Jesus never said anyone is going to hell for not accepting him as their Lord and Savior. When he occasionally mentioned hell it was to the evil politicians and Priests who abused their authority.
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Maybe this was because Yeshua was a Jew and they don’t believe in “hell” … ??
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No, Jesus wasn’t God the Father
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The bible is a history for the Israelites not for you or for me. Everything in bible already happened nothing is going to happen today or in the future that is in bible. It’s not a instruction book by the creator of the Universe and never was.
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I agree.
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Strange that parsons and other charlatans tell us it’s a manual for the present.
In fact, to some people, if it’s not in the bible it is not important
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That is because it had been passed down from many of generations after the Europeans brought it to America and enforced it onto the Native Americans.
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Ah so only politicians and priests are hell bound. What good news
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Anyone who does the things I listed.
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