the archetypical atheist

I thought I knew them as those without belief in deities. I have been wrong all along.

This author and his fan base seem to know something we don’t. One wonders why they would claim Lucifer is an atheist at the same time claim Lucifer rebelled against god? Am I missing something?

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Chronicles of YHWH 27: Chain Reaction

Chain Reaction

YHWH: Lucifer?

Lucifer: Speaking.

YHWH: What’s that bluish glow I’m seeing in hell?

Lucifer: Radioactive cores. Uranium and Plutonium.

YHWH: What are radioactive cores doing in hell?

Lucifer: I run out of sulphur and brimstone a while back. Too many sinners trooping in. Besides, the radioactive cores create a much hotter flame. And they can last for much, much longer.

YHWH: Ah, interesting. Good thinking. How many sinners are you barbecuing, currently?

Lucifer: Almost five billions. The atheists, the Muslims, the Rastafarians, the Hindus and Buddhists, the Communists, and the Pope. I hear that some evangelical Christians are also on the way.

YHWH: Yeah. Some of them were wearing linen underwear, against my orders. Who wears linen against the skin, anyway? Creeps.

Lucifer: One impending problem, though.

YHWH: Yes?

Lucifer: The increasingly higher amounts of radioactive material needed might soon reach a critical mass, and detonate in a massive explosion. Hell will be no more.

YHWH: That’s fine. I’ll move heaven further away.

Lucifer: Oh. Alright then.

YHWH: Just ensure that those Christians wearing linen pants are nearest the cores when the explosion happens.

Lucifer: Uh, alright. Will do.

 

N/B: For access to all anecdotes in this series, check out List of all “Chronicles of YHWH” notes.